tristitia Prandium
by Bondomu
Summary: Dave takes to comfort food, and Karkat doesn't think that's healthy. DaveKat [[This is Humor/Romance/Hurt-Comfort but doesn't let you add more than two genres, sadly.]]


**I had a prompt for this but I suck at writing for prompts? Especially since the prompt was a sentence a character had to say. As most of you could probably figure out, I bullshit my way through my fics. I don't proofread, I don't edit (unless somewhere in the future there's a particular mistake I notice and I get the** _ **s**_ **) and I most certainly don't know what I'm writing when I start. I always- almost ALWAYS 100% make it up as I go.**  
 _*edit as I'm actually halfway through the fic- holy shit guys there's rain and thunder? in tHIS Aussie suburb? The Gods must have seen me getting back into writing Homestuck again after my disaster of a JohnKat fic from 2014. They have come to stop me. *edit again- tHERE'S HAIL WHAT the FUCK?*_

 _ **Prompt: "It's called a depression meal, look it up."**_

 _Start_

"What the hell are you doing?" Karkat growls, "You're eating so much of the fucking food, leave some for me, asshole."

"What? No, get your own damn food." Dave mumbles through a mouthful of meat pie whilst simultaneously dragging the box of edibles away from Karkat; whose hand was outstretched and ready to seize them. "If you're so hungry alchemize your own crap."

"Dave you never eat this much crap. Did I do something to piss you off so you feel the need to hog all the fucking food for yourself? Is that it? Leave a troll starving to death over here while you pig out on all the food I happened to HELP you alchemize?" Karkat nearly yells, only managing to hold himself back because some people happen to be asleep.

"Dude, chill. It's called a depression meal, look it up." Dave grumbles.

Karkat pauses for a moment, "Depression meal? What, like a sadness buffet? Is that a thing?"

"Yes Karkat, it's thing us humans do. Eat away the Void." Dave says, grabbing a spoonful of custard.

"Does it work?" Karkat asks, seating himself across from Dave.

"Not in the long term, I guess." Dave shoves a handful of chips in his mouth, "Buht titgives yuo somthin to focss on."

"I didn't understand any of that fucking blabber." Karkat glares.

"I said it gives you something to focus on. You know, like a shitty form of distracting you from the impending feelings of doom that comes with being on this fucking space rock." Dave mumbles, reaching for a pack of chocolate eggs.

"Can I eat with you?" Karkat asks, staring at Dave.

Dave sighs, "You might as damn well, I don't even know if I can finish all this. If I did I'll be as plump as Santa on his present de-heist. Guzzling peoples baked goods and animal milk."

"What the fuck? Who's Santa?" Karkat mumbles.

"Tacky dude in a red suit. Holds no real meaning other than atrocious money grubbing." Dave shrugs, downing 4 mini chocolate eggs in a single go.

"Weird." Karkat says, picking up a slice of pizza. Tastes like shit but it's too late to back out now, he thinks. "Dave what the fuck is on this?"

Dave looks over to Karkat, "Oh, that's an Icelandic pizza. I have no fucking clue what is actually on it, but all I know is that it tastes great."

"Well it tastes like shit." Karkat grumbles.

"Well if you dont like it then give it to me. You can finish off these chocolates." Dave says chucking the chocolate eggs to Karkat.

"Ugh, fine." Karkat relents, handing Dave the half bitten slice of pizza while picking up the chocolate eggs which have conviniently rolled everywhere. "Dave can I ask you something?"

"Sure, whatever." Dave says, shoving the entire slice of pizza into his mouth.

"My guess is that humans 'Depression Eat' rarely. I haven't seen you do it before, I think. You said it's something humans tend to do, and you made it sound like a commonplace practice. Perhaps it is, but if so common then why have neither you nor Rose done it? Unless you were bullshitting me about it all but still. What's troubling you?" Karkat asks, trying to stare through Dave's glasses.

"I dunno dude. It is something humans do, yeah, but like everyone has their own reasons for it." Dave shrugs, "I guess I'm just feeling like shit. I want to go back to how my life was but at the same time I really fucking don't want that at all because the more I think of it the more it wasn't the best either. This... This whole game, this charade... it's been both the best and worst times. I've seen my friends die, hell, I've seen myself die more than anyone else, and like that shit fucks with your head, you know? You head into some game your bros are wanting you to play and you think it's going to be a jolly boring old time but no, suddenly everyone's dead, I'm dead X-whatever amount, and shit is going down, it is hitting the floor instead of the roof in how far this shit is going in it's downwards spiral."

Karkat pushes the box of food out of the way and shuffles forwards until his knees bump Dave's, "There's nothing you could have done, and I will be here anytime you feel like this. Think of Rose, of John and Jade. You have them, they are alive and two of them are travelling as fast as they fucking can to meet up with you and everyone else. Focus on looking forward to the good things, and Dave? It's ok to cry you know, I can see you trying to hide it."

Dave leans forward to rest his forehed on Karkat's shoulder, "It feels good you know, to let this out of my system."

"You bottle up too much, you'll break. We all need each other on this stupid meteor, so we better start depending on each other. Not that I'd say that to any of the other fuckers aboard the SS SpaceRock." Karkat replies, reaching up to pat Dave's head gently.

"Man this has been a hell of feelings jam." Dave says, "I haven't even said all my thoughts and yet I feel somewhat a little better than before."

"We can pause the information torrent if you want?" Karkat suggests.

"Info torrent; yes, let's pause. My hearts not in it as much now. Patting my head? Don't stop. Never stop." Dave says, leaning forward more with enough force to push the both of them over.

"Urgh, you're too heavy. Get off." Karkat mumbles.

Dave rolls to Karkat's side, letting his cape cover them both a small bit. "Better?"

"Very much so." Karkat replies, leaning up and reaching out to wrap his arms around Dave's torso, pulling them both closer to each other.

"Damn I wish the Mayor was here right now, in this very room." Dave sighs, "He'd be great asset to this feelings jam."

"Yeah. He would. Always there when you need him. Somehow. That great little fucker." Karkat replies."You should probably find another form of comfort than food though. Cant's be very healthy to stuff your face like that."

"I suppose. But it does its job in the short term. Unless you can think of anything else I could do." Dave says, shifting onto his side so he's face to face with Karkat.

"Well... I guess we can figure something out. I mean, who the fuck knows; not like I was ever good at dealing with my own shit either." Karkat grumbles, "Well, I guess I'm doing better than Terezi right now. She's stuffing herself with fucking faygo."

"Let's just be thankful I'm not stuffing my face with goddamn clown propaganda either." Dave replies.

"But you are still stuffing your face. Just maybe not with fucking gross shit." Karkat says, "Might not be great for you but at least it's better than what's she's doing to herself."

"Yeah." Dave says, attempting a shrug which results in chaffed arms and carpet burn."Ow."

"Dumb fuck." Karkat laughs, earning himself a half-hearted sideways kick. "Ow, jeez sorry."

There's a comfortable silence for a bit before Dave quietly says, "Thank you."

"For what?" Karkat replies.

"You know, for this feelings jam. It helped." Dave mumbles.

"Oh. Yeah." Karkat says, "I guess thank you too."

"For what? I didn't do anything." Dave says, raising an eyebrow.

"For listening. No one else does." Karkat says, looking anywhere but at Dave.

Dave doesn't reply, only leaning in to rest his forehead against Karkat's.

"You know it's funny. If you'd said to me three years ago, heck even two, 'hey Karkat one day we're going to be in this intimate fuck-knows-what relationship and we'll be having fucking personal feelings jams together' I'd have laughed. It wouldn't have seemed possible, but you know? You the know fuck what?" Karkat says, "I'm so glad it turned out this way."

"Yeah me too. I came here thinking I'd be all up and redromming the hell out of Terezi in some human - troll ceremony but... well, shit went haywire and now here I am. Constant denial is officially just the river once more." Dave smirks.

"Well, I understood about jack-shit of that last part you said but I guess... yeah. Here we are." Karkat says.

"You know, denial? The Nile? That long ass river in Egypt? Actually, fuck it you wouldn't know, what the hell I am saying. Well it's probably a moot point anyway because the denial I got over a while ago on this shitty-assed meteor, but I guess it's my views that changed really. I mean human views, by the way. I'm still not fully up to date on the whole troll quadrants thing, and don't rant about that right now please, but I guess what I'm saying is urgh, why am I bothering? I'm ranting about useless shit that probably doens't even mean anything." Dave mumbles the last part.

"No, I think I get what you're saying. You're worrying over human sexuality stuff again, right? You said your views changed, but it wasn't necessarily pertaining to sexuality as a singular thing but as a whole? Or something like that?" Karkat replies, hoping he guess right about what Dave was talking about.

"Well, yeah I guess. I think the thing is that changed is I stopped viewing sexuality as a thing at all, kind of like how trolls kinda just don't care about a whole 'labelling the preferances' sort of thing? Hanging out here with you guys and all the stuff you have lying around made me kind of see how humans like us view everything as orderly and namely as we can, like a fucking world of metaphorical filing cabinets. Shit, I guess that's what happens when you haven't stayed on Earth for over 3 fucking years. Fuck, even Rose is dealing with Troll stuff somewhat better than I, I'm pretty sure she wants to actively check out how Quadrants work. I guess I can't say I'm down with either Human OR Troll crap, to be honest. It's like I'm stuck in an in-between that everyone knows is there but no one mentions because it's useless to do so and serves no point? Shit, maybe I'm secretly a Salamander but for all I know those little guys might have their crap too. Can't say I'm like the mayor, though fuck do I love that guy, but he just seems kind of disinterested in romance which is great and just a wonderful bonus to one of his many qualities. Oh shit, I'm not saying YOUR particular interest in romance is bad- I'm saying from a point of view of finding a partne-" Dave gets cut off mid-sentence by Karkat placing a hand over his mouth.

"Dave, shut up." Karkat whispers, "I understand everything you're saying even though you're talking so fast my think pan is about to reach a hot enough temperature that I could cook with it. So what if you don't think you fit into either human or troll shit? No one is going to like you any less. Honestly, with all the human-troll shenanigans going on lately and in the inevitable future, will Quadrants even continue to exist? I mean of course they will but just maybe not between those of us here now. I mean, maybe they will but who's to even fucking say? Everything is so chaotic, or at least, will be- that no one is probably even going to give a shit. Ah fuck now you got me ranting about shit."

"Man, we sure do love our rants." Dave says, there's a smile tugging at his lips.

"I'm pretty sure if we don't stop each other, then we'd just keep going on forever." Karkat grins, "Constant talk machines."

"Do nothing but yak each others heads off." Dave's smiling now, "God I hope we never change."

"Yeah." Karkat says, another comfortable silence follows.

"I feel glad I've got you." Dave whispers.

"You should be." Karkat grins, leaning in to gently kiss Dave.

 **End**

 **Well as usual I make another shit ending, which happens to be my specialty. I'm currently working on a multichap DirkJohn fic, but unlike the mistake I made with my old fanfic, this time I will wait until I complete it before uploading the chapters. (ps- if you read that old fanfic I want you all to know that I had actually finished redoing the first few chapters last year, but my laptop died and I lost everything. Including that one DGM fic I've been working on for like 4 years. 4 fucking years of progress. The thing was huge, like my biggest fanfic project ever. I had actually rewritten most of the entirety of DGM- as if it had a whole different storyline focused on the SAME storyline so it wasnt even an Au. It was like my best fucking work and it's GONE. Oops, now I'm ranting but Im just SO MAD.**


End file.
